Avoidant Attachment in action...

Avoidance makes for great storyline tension! So our culture often glamourises avoidants and shows them enacting sudden magical transformations for their love interest. But don't be fooled: ultimately change will come from inside, potentially with a partner's support but not from them. And true strength lies not in isolation, but in being brave enough to be vulnerable, fully acknowledge our need for human connection and stable attachment and work through its complexities.

Books - essential reading:
  • Attached - Levine & Heller (amazon)

  • Wired for Love and Wired for Dating - Stan Tatkin (amazon)

  • The Power of Attachment - Diane Poole Heller (website)                                           

  • Mindsight - Dan Siegal (intro) (amazon)

  • Avoidant: How to Love (or Leave) a Dismissive Partner - Jeb Kinnison (amazon)

  • Facing Codependence - Pia Mellody (amazon)

  • Radical Candor: How To Get What You Want by Saying What You Mean - Kim Scott (amazon)

  • Not Nice: Stop People Pleasing, Staying Silent, & Feeling Guilty... And Start Speaking Up, Saying No, Asking Boldly, And Unapologetically Being Yourself - Aziz Gazipura (amazon)

  • Boundaries - Cloud & Townsend (amazon)

  • Trauma & the Avoidant Client - Robert Muller (amazon)

Podcast - How To Feel Safe & Secure With Your Partner, with Stan Tatkin

Some very readable links:

This site has drawn from these links and many other resources


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