People in an avoidant attachment pattern tend to attribute their single status to external circumstances and not having met the right person. When in a relationship they will suffer from a lingering feeling that something is missing and something else is just around the corner, forgetting the sadness they felt alone. They can get into relationships easily, but a few months in a switch will flip and they begin feeing overwhelmed, smothered, their personal freedom encroached upon and start thinking about all the missed opportunities. Minor differences are perceived as a death knell for the relationship, and the closer someone tries to get the more they will pull away. This is because, while like all of us they are wired for connection, in need of stable attachment and may believe very much they want a relationship, the desire is different from the reality, where unconsciously the close presence of an attachment figure is inherently threatening. So they are not trusting by nature, and inwardly more comfortable in pursuit than in the stability of feeling loved in long-term relationships.


 1. Dating Behaviours

 Early interest

 Physical touch, sex & casual dating

 Fear of getting trapped

 Disbelief in love & relationships

 2. The Phantom Ex & Perfect Partner

 The phantom ex

 The perfect partner

 Who they go for

 Pairings with insecure attachments

 Pairing with the securely attached

 Beware: the limitations of partner choice

 3. Who's Their Type?